Non-Attachment – Not Indifference

One of the secrets to a successful sales conversation – one that ends with your ideal client saying “Yes please!” to working with you – is Non-Attachment. This means genuinely being OK with whatever decision your client makes – whether that is to work with you or not.

If you are in any way personally attached to the outcome then your client will pick up on this energy and start resisting you, and resistance on the part of your client is not only the enemy of sales. It is also the enemy of the client as it prevents them from making the decision that is right for them.

This is on my mind today because it’s something that I experienced myself last week

I had bought a service from someone and we had completed the piece of work that I had committed to and paid for. However, the service provider wanted me to commit to a second phase which I didn’t. I was very clear about this and was able to articulate clearly why I felt it wasn’t right for me just now. But rather than respecting my decision the supplier clung on. I felt she was unhappy with my decision, was not really listening to me and that they she was reluctant to end the phone conversation. Even after I’d put the phone down it felt a bit like her energy was “sticking” to me.

Now I’m sure that she had my best interests at heart and could probably see more clearly than I could how much better off I would be if I went into the next stage – but she didn’t guide me through a conversation where I could conclude myself that there was more work to be done.

So instead of service it felt like attachment and clinginess.

So what’s the secret?

Now of course I know that it can be really hard to be non-attached in a sales conversation if that one clients “Yes” makes the difference between whether you make the mortgage payment that month, or whether the kids get new uniform for the new term.

So, first of all get really good at your sales process – whether this is 1-1 sales conversations or delivering signature talks. When you know that that say 60% of all one-one sales conversations become clients, or 30% of a room when you give a talk, then you can start to relax into your business and trust in a regular flow of clients. And then you don’t have the same level of attachment to the outcome with any one particular client.

Also, if you have a structure to take people through that helps them to get in touch with the pain or problem they are currently experiencing and get them to really focus on how things could be different as a result of working with you, your client will make their own decision to say “Yes please!” to working with you – without you needing to “push”. And you will get a lot less of those moments where a client walks away without getting the help you know they so badly need.I know how painful this can be for you if you are in business to make a difference.

However, I don’t for a minute mean non-attachment to equate to indifference.

Indifference would mean that you don’t care about the outcome. But you should care. Enough to take your client through a perfectly structured sales conversation or signature talk that feels comfortable for them. And to do it to the best of your ability – no laziness or cutting corners.

If during a sales conversation it is very clear to me that my client needs to work with me and will benefit I am not afraid to say so. Very clearly and very directly. So I don’t hold back on my recommendation that they do further work with me. But at the same time I don’t ‘push’.

I have enough clients in my pipeline – and enough confidence in my sales conversations and signature talk – that I can trust someone to make the right decision for them. And if I feel they are making the wrong decision I am not afraid to tell them that but then leave it there – and leave the door wide open for them to come back to me when they are ready.