How to Fall in Love with Sales

How to Fall in Love with Sales

If you are like most of the heart-centred business owners that I know you probably shy away from situations that involve “selling” your services.

I know this sounds kind of crazy because of course you do want clients!

But it’s actually really common – you’re in business because you want to make a difference to others, or because you are passionate about what you do. And you want to make a good living from it too.

But it’s not just  about the money for you, is it? And you’d be mortified if a potential client thought that you were just out to “sell” to them.

And so what do you do? You avoid following up people who show an interest in working with you, and when you do get into a conversation you stumble and falter and things go nowhere fast. If this sounds like you, you are definitely not alone – I’ve even known people who ignore enquiries from their own website because they are too scared of getting into a sales interaction!

Fall in love with sales

At the same time you know that to get clients you need to sell. You do know this. But it makes you feel so uncomfortable that most of the time you prefer to ignore it.

So instead you do a lot of “being busy”, hoping that will lead to clients landing in your lap. You go networking, you spend time on social media, attend seminars and buy marketing courses.

Yet you are no further towards a thriving business and a full book of clients then when you started out.

And this bothers you. Deeply. When friends and family ask you how it’s going you feel like a fraud because you don’t want to admit that it’s only your savings that are keeping you going.

But the worst part of all is that you are no more fulfilled than when you were in your job. Day by day you are not making the difference you know you can make, you are not changing lives, you are not doing your small part to make the world a happier or less stressful place. And to cap it all you are starting to lose confidence in what you do.

All because you shy away from situations that might involve “selling” (in fact you probably think that’s a dirty word!)

And really, there’s no surprise you feel like this:

It’s out of your comfort zone:   It’s just not something you know how to do. You’ve never been trained in it and you don’t really know what you should be saying.

You don’t want to seem pushy:   You dread the idea that you might be interpreted as pushy. So you prefer to do the opposite and tell yourself “they know what I do, they’ll call when they need me”. But they don’t, do they?

It’s just “not you”:   Maybe you’ve already learned some traditional sales techniques and have a good idea what you “should” be doing , but it feels inauthentic and out of alignment with your values.

But here’s the good news. You really can fall in love with sales. Here’s what some of my clients have said:

“I used to dread sales conversations I now love them because I know how to do it with integrity”

“I cannot tell you how much I used to loathe sales but I’m unfazed by it now. And of course I’m loving my clients too!”

“I now look forward to my sales conversations knowing that I have the clients best interests at heart”

So How can YOU  start to Fall in Love with Sales?

1. Change your Thinking
One of the biggest things standing between you and your next client is your own thinking about sales and what it is. If you believe that sales is inherently manipulative, self-serving and downright “wrong” then of course you aren’t going to want to do it. Instead I recommend you take a different view and look at sales as an opportunity for you to really serve your clients in a very deep way and see your sales conversation as the first step in their journey of transformation with you.

2. Know your Value
When you try to sell your services without believing wholeheartedly in the value of your work then no wonder you feel out of integrity. After all you are not a used car salesman! You may need to do a little work on this, but when you deeply connect with the value you bring you can feel totally congruent when stating your price and asking for payment and a lot of the discomfort disappears.

3. Expand not Contract
If you are terrified of rejection or worried what the client might think about you that’s contraction. It is based on fear, it makes you small and it repels clients. Expansion on the other hand is based on faith and trust. It’s about putting the highest good of the client ahead of what is best for you – caring so much about others that you will put your own discomfort aside and step up and hold a space for them. A space to have a conversation about changing their life, business or relationship.

4. Connect from the Heart
If you’ve fallen into the trap of believing all the old sales myths then this one might come as a surprise, but what could be more obvious? If you are to guide a client to a decision to work with you then you have to be able to connect deeply with them – with their hopes and fears, challenges and dreams. You have to care about them and believe in them. And they have to know you care. This includes being willing to tell them if you don’t think you are the best person for them.

5. Follow a Structure
A structure that you can guide a client through step-by-step will  give you a huge confidence boost because it allows you to enter into a sales conversation without fearing that you won’t know what to say or that you might unintentionally come across a bit pushy. Learning a structure is the first step on the journey that will end with you saying:

“I’m amazed that I used to hate sales conversations, now I love them as it gives me an opportunity to connect with the clients so deeply”.

If this post has struck a chord with you and you recognise that your relationship with sales and selling is holding you back in your business then I’d love to share with you my ‘7 Steps to Yes’, an easy-to-follow process for guiding your ideal clients into a whole-hearted ‘Yes please!’

Click here for full details and to sign up

And let me know in the comments below how you are finding your sales conversations!

"THE 7 STEPS TO YES" Watch these short videos and start to fall in love with sales

Please leave a comment as I would love to hear your thoughts


  1. Bonnie Church on July 14, 2017 at 12:23 pm

    Such impeccable wisdom. I have shared with 350 independent unfranchise owners. Many struggling with the tendency to contract rather than expand.

    • Catherine on July 14, 2017 at 3:36 pm

      Hi Bonnie
      I’m glad you found it valuable, and thank you for sharing it, it’s very appreciated.

  2. Bonnie Church on July 14, 2017 at 12:22 pm

    Such impeccable wisdom. I have shared with 350 independent unfranchise owners. Many struggling with the tendency to contract rather than expand.

  3. Catherine on August 13, 2015 at 10:47 am

    Hi Pippa
    Ooh! I’m delighted the blog gave you a boost – and well done on signing up your client for another year – may that be the first of many who decide to extend.
    Thanks for the comment. x

  4. Pippa Duncan on August 13, 2015 at 9:56 am

    Hi Catherine

    Just wanted to say thanks (again!) after reading this blog. I was just putting off phoning a customer about their annual renewal and scared that this time they were going to say ‘no, we don’t want to continue’. I read this article which inspired me to ‘expand’ and immediately picked up the phone. I asked to meet up this week to chat about his ads but he said he was busy and would call tomorrow. Normally, I would have just waited and got more scared, but I said that’s fine, but are you OK to go ahead with your adverts and we can chat about it further when I see you. He said yes!
    Thanks for the boost!

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